Cute pic.

This is were I wish I was right now...that'd be tight...being on a beach with my feet in the sand...instead of here...with my feet in Homestead and the awesome Indiana weather....loveeee itttt....notttt.  I wanna go somewhere big for spring break this year with a bunch of my friends...I just don't know where.  <3 Anywhere but Fort Wayne would be tight.

Currently Week 6

Pages this week: 110
Total Pages: 655
Book: Life- Keith Richards

1. One note leads to another, and you never know quite what's going to come next, and you don't want to.
2. It's like walking on a beautiful tightrope.
3. I was basically a musical sponge.

I like when Keith talks about his love for music because some people never find that in life and never become so in love with a hobbie like some people are with music and I think it's pretty tight.. I love listening to music but I don't have a musical bone in my body.

Another day at Moe's

Well I just got off work...I swear I spend more time at Moe's then I do sleeping lately.  I just found out today that I have to cater an event with Shelby and Frances at Vera Bradley and I'm exciteddddd. It's so much more fun with you get to go with your friends.  My brother finally came home for the first time in like a week..shocker. I know he's gonna try and chat with me about things and I am not down...I have better things to do.  He just pisses me off everytime I talk to him lately..it's amazing how much people can change because of the people they date.  My childhood best friend did the same thing to me...and now I don't even see her...it's all about her boyfriend...it literally makes me sick looking at them because it makes me so mad...after being best friends with someone for 10 years then they drop you like a fly..it sucks..it makes you trust no one...ever.  And if that's how things are going to be...I don't want to trust people..they just screw you over and what's the point of being "j-momma" and helping everyone you care about with everything if they don't return the favor...I just don't see the point anymore.  So I wake up everyday...go to school...go to work...and that's about it...I'm just trying to get through this year and on to bigger and better things in life.  And I am about to delete like 500 people off my facebook cause I don't care about their stupid lives...so if i delete you...don't send me another friend request...you post too much pointless crap on your facebook and it annoys me.  Well I feel better now that I vented to myself:) Goodnight Blogger.

J-Momma. <3

Crappy Day...

Well I had my senior meeting today...and it makes me nervous...i'm not ready for college.  I'm freakin' out about it cause i'm not exactly sure what I want to do yet. I know I want to go into the medical field but I don't have very good grades because I hate homestead and most of the people in it.  I know things will be different next year because I won't know everyone so it will be about my studies and making new friends...not worrying about what everyone things that I already know.  I have to make something out of myself.. I feel like everyone's doubting me lately because of stupid shit and I'm already sick of it and it just started. I just want everyone to leave me alone and let me handle my own life..I've been doing just fine and I don't need any help.  My parents are trying to be involved and they need to butt out..they haven't been involved for a long time..why start now..  So I've been trying to read more lately cause it makes me stop thinking about all the messed up things i'm dealing with right now and this book is even more messed up...well maybe...we'll see.  It's about Keith Richards from the Rolling Stones and his life from when he was a young child.  He lived in another country so it's kinda weird reading about all the places and people he talks about...and it was in the 50's and 60's and things were a lot different back then.  He talks about how his dad was never in his life because he worked all the time and he tried to make up for lost time sometimes but that's hard to do.  His mother was the strict one..always worried about what he was doing and where he was..he got into a lot of trouble in high school because he just didn't care anymore and I don't blame the guy. The only reason I deal with the stupid crap I deal with at Homestead is because I know that if I don't I'll be worthless later in life and I don't want that for myself and for my future family.  My life is the opposite of his..my mom is the nice one and my dad is the hard ass.  She's always trying to get in my business and so is he and I try to keep what I tell them on a need to know basis because their annoying and I have better things to do then explain myself to them every freaking day.  I'm very able to take care of myself and I've always been that way...I don't like when people try to talk to me about my issues...I can take care of it..it's no one else's business and they just need to butt out..that's just how it's always been..and it's not changing 6 months before I turn 18...no way.

J-Momma.

Currently Week 5

Pages this week: 105
Total pages: 545
Life--By: Keith Richards

Favorite Sentences of the Week:
1. Memory is fiction, and an alternative fiction of that event is from my friend and playmate Sandra Hull, consulted all these years later. 
2.  For companionship I kept pets.  I had a cat and a mouse.
3.  Then raise the scarlet standard high, Within its shade we'll live and die, Though cowards flinch and traitors sneer, We'll keep the red flag flying here.

I love this 2nd sentence because no one thinks to have two pets that hate each other but protect each other from the outside world...pretttyyy sweettt...and I like cats. :) 

Round Three

Well the weekend has come to an end way to fast.  The Wild 96.3 Concert suckeddddddd. It rained the whole time and the girls looked like nasty strippers...I was glad to get out of there after ten hours of being at work.  Friday night was Homecoming and the game was fun.  I'll look back on those memories 20 years from now and be glad I went so I'm glad Shelby and I went.  At the pep session we played tug-a-war with the juniors and they had 9 huge football players so they beat us :( but were still better then them..just cause their huge doesn't mean anything:) George of course came out to piss me off and it worked...that boys gonna get it..there was a reason for the round three title..but it's gone now.  I worked at the Lantern last night until 2 a.m. and I was pissed.  This creepy dude that works there was being really mean so I'm not gonna work there anymore cause I'm sick of dealing with him. My dad got a new job so they say I can stop working so many hours which is good...I just hope things work out cause I need a freaking break.  Today I worked at the Light the Night walk and it rained the whole time and my arms feel like jello from moving all the crap I had to move these past few days...and of course I work everyday this week again...ohhh joyyy..well I'm goin' to bed...Goodd Nightttt Bloggerrrr.

J-Momma

Fog Delay Day

Well my day started off good today with a nice 2 hour delay :)!  I went out to lunch with Eden & Elise and it was bomb.  They have Etymology together and made me laugh cause a bunch of people in their class read my blog and crack up..that made me laugh.  I work everyday this week but it's whatever..shit happens..need the $$$.  Moe's is catering the Wild 96.3 concert on Thursday and Shelby and I are going and we are stokeddddd. We get to stay at the concert after we serve food and your suppose to be 18 to go but because were Moe's Hoe's we get in free with passes.  Then Nemo's havin' people over because he works at the radio station and were gonna have a good time.  I've had like no free time lately and it sucks...sometimes I just wanna curl up in a ball in my bed and watch TV like a normal lazy teenager but I'm not a normal teenager...I have more responsibilities and I take on more then most for my family and not many kids have the balls or the brains to do so.  It's all catchin' up to me though..my body is tired and needs some rest for a few days...but the world doesn't stop turnin' just cause I want to so I guess I just gotta stick it out and hope everything I'm doing now will pay off in the future.  My brother and his girlfriend went to the Cubs game with my car yesterday and gave it back to me with no gas when I filled it up before he told me he was taking the car...so help me God if he doesn't put gas in the car..I'm going to shave his legs in his sleep...just sayin'.  So I've been thinking and because I love listening to youtube videos and I never remember the songs I like...I'm gonna write a few in my blogs while I listen to them...while I'm writting...I'm diggin' the idea.

Favorite Songs of the Week:

Amen-Edens Edge

God Gave Me You- Blake Shelton

I love you this big- Scotty McCreery

Barefoot Blue Jean Night- Jake Owens

Crazy Girl- Eli Young Band 

Love Don't Run- Steve Holy

& some T. Swift that reminds me of the good old days...<3

~J-Momma. <3~

Class Claims

1. In Gene Kelly's "Good Morning" [an elegantly exquisite setting and excitingly exuberant style is] conveyed [through the delicate, and brisk attire and the frantic yet hysterical emotion of the actors.]

 

2. In Todrick Hall's "I Wanna Be On Glee," Hall's plea to Glee creator Ryan Murphy shows Hall's inventiveness and artistic talents through the music video's cleverly pariodistic lyrics, assertive instrumentals, and effervescent choreography.

3.In the "So Long, Farewell" musical number of the Sound of Music, the Von Trapp children's bright  facial expressions, poised choreography, and cooing, melodic music develops the sense of lighthearted pleasure and soothing amusement.

4.The hollow, church-like presentation of the sandcastle highlights the convincing superiority over typical sand creations. -- Laughapalooza--Favorite <3

5. In this music video, Justin Bieber and Chris Brown's powerful, driving movement, harmonic vocals, and romantic, loving facials, express a sense of passionate romance and vibrant love.

--- My favorite class claim is the one by Laughapalooza about a sand castle.  That sand castle is so awesome and it has so many different buildings with so much detail in each one, I've never seen anything like it.

Usher's Moving Mountains

Observe:                                                                     Infer:

Posture: fluid, casual, powerful                                 Energetic

Setting: raining in the mountains                                Explosive

Sound: rain, thundering                                             Impatient

Facial Expressions: broken, weak, hurt,                   Sorrowful

wanting his woman                                                     Seductive

Choreography: swift, smooth, sexy                          Sentimental

                                                                                    Bitter

                                                                                    Afraid

                                                                                    Disappointed

                                                                                    Hard-hearted

                                                                                    Lonely

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nQr-HmfXZ-Q&ob=av2e

{ In Usher’s music video “Moving Mountains”,  Usher’s powerful posture,  smooth choreography, and rain and thunder in the background} expresses { a sense seduction and energetic exuberance.}

Currently Week 4

Favorite Sentences:
1. I think some of us had died and gone to heaven, because a year before we were plugging London clubs, and we're doing all right, but actually in the next year, we're somewhere we thought we'd never be.
2. But then all you had to do was cross the tracks and you'd get a real education.  If we were playing with black musicians, they'd look after us.
3. It wasa unbelieveable, every pocked or place you looked...I never knew I had that much coke in my life!

This book is crazyyyy. It's all about the Rolling Stones traveling the world with all their drugs and getting pulled over and freaking out because they are all so high that they don't even know how much coke they have on them.  They hid it in their car...in every pocket...everywhere...they were loadeddddddddd.

Week 4: Number of pages-105
Total Pages- 440
Books I've Read and Reading:
Tweak
Life--Keith Richards

Poem of the month: 
"When the Dog is Sick"
By: Jim Moore

It's a cute little poem about how dogs can love you as much as they want without anyone stopping them.

Sleep over.

Well today was another horrible day. Yesterday was pretty bad but today takes home the gold.  I already didn't feel good when I got to school and I had a bad feeling about going to school.  I got piss tested in 3rd period and that's always no fun.....then I had to go with Momma Mcgee to pick up the little's Mcgee's crap from the Redneck down the street today and it suckedddd. He was such a jerkk...tryin' to take my baby and shit. Ahlexa is one as of last Tuesday and her father is just retarded so were all dealing with a bunch of crap right now.  Tay-Bay and I are havin' a little sleep over tonight because it was needed and I didn't get my paper written like I was suppose to but I can't focus today...my body is drained and needs sleep.  I'll work on it this weekend instead of going out.
Well I finished Tweak and it was amazingggggg. My new favorite book.  I just started reading a book called "Life" and it's about Keith Richards and the Rolling Stones so I'm excited to read this one to because it's about to be nuts.  Well it's about time for us to go to bed. Goodnight Bloggerrrrrr.

J-Momma

Annoyed.

Today was just bad. I didn't go to school cause I felt like crap so I went to the doctor and got tested for mono again...hopefully I don't have it again or I'm screwed. I had it two years ago and I had to quit basketball because of it and that just broke my heart.  I had other reasons for quitting but mostly it was because my body was tired and couldn't do it anymore.  I can't just quit my job....I need the money and I'm in co-op so there is no option.  I think I've just been doing too much lately.  I sleep all the time and I'm always tired...maybe I'm just depressed... I dunno. I guess I'll find out when I get the tests back.  Today sucked cause it's been raining all day and my brother is being a total douche bag like always.  I'm so sick of him...he's never home and when he is...he's just a dick.  I don't have time to deal with those kinds of people in my life.  I have better things to do then listen to him talk about his stupid girlfriend...cause that's all he cares about.  You would think he would care about his sister and his parents but he doesn't.. he's not even home once a week. He comes home to shower..sometimes ...eat...and drop his laundry off. I'm just sick of dealing with all our family problems by myself.  He's never around to care and it pisses me off.  He has no idea what I have to deal with everyday..even if he did know I don't think he would care.  It feels like everyone I talk to has bad money problems right now and we do too.  It's so hard to get through everyday dealing with all this.  People say high school should be the best years of your life but I hope their wrong.  Once I save enough money to live by myself and pay for my own car things will be a lot easier but that will be years from now if I have to keep helping every week.  I don't mind helping because their my parents but I wish my brother would help too.  He's been helping for like a year but things are bad right now and we need his help. They are our parents...that's a given to help them.  But he doesn't care...he would rather spend his money on his girlfriend or his car...real cute right...jerk.  I wish he wasn't so much like my father.  He doesn't listen to my mom either and it's so annoying.  I just wish we could all get along and help each other but no...it's all on my shoulders...like always. Whatever. Screw people.

J-Momma

Currently

Pages this week: 120
Total Pages: 330
Books I've Read: Tweak

Favorite Sentences:

1.  " As long as you look for someone else to validate who you are by seeking their approval, you are setting yourself up for disaster.  You have to be whole and complete in yourself.  No one can give you that.  You have to know who you are- what others say is irrelevant. "

2.  It's too goddamn early and my stomach is all cramped up as I board the 747 for Honolulu. 

3.  When I was little, especially when I visited my mom in L.A., the only escape I had was watching movies.

I love this first sentence because it's true...if you only look to other people for approval you'll never be happy because you could do anything and everything in life and people still wouldn't be happy...so you have to do all you can for yourself and no one else.

September 11th

Well today is september 11th and it's weird to think that everything happened 10 years ago today...I was in second grade and so young then.  I didn't really undetstand back then but now I know everything that happened and how many people died and how bad it hurt our country.  Well that's my thoughts on that subject...nap time.

J-Momma

Another day in Paradise....

Happy Hump Day!!! Only two more days of school then the football game with my girls and hangin' out after that.  I've been waiting for weeks to have a Friday night off and be able to go to the football and be a normal senior.  There is soooo much drama right now it's just annoying...i hate people and their stupid shit I have to deal with everyday.  I'm gonna make a sign that says " Whatever you want...I don't care..Leave me alone..end of story"...and i'm gonna put it on my shirt...swear. Normally I write my thoughts in a journal but because I have to write so many words every week on blogger....I just speak my mind on here. :) and it's workin' just fine.  I feel like the days just past me by and I can't even enjoy being a teenager...people say these are the best years of your life...I wanna have my good years. I've been a wild child all of high school but since I started workin' I've gotten a lot better and a lot smarter about my actions.  In my book(which I'm almost done with!), Nic has everything going for him but he messes everything up because instead of growing out of the party stage...he turned his party stage into his whole life...and that's how people become addicted to drugs...I've seen it first hand and it's the saddest thing I've ever seen and I hope I don't have to see it again but I know in the next ten years i'm probably going to lose some friends from high school to drugs and they might die...that's just a fact of life.  If kids in high school have to drink in the morning just to get through the day because they party so much..they have a serious problem that is going to be with them for the rest of their lives...and when they turn 21 it's going to be 10 times worse because they can go to clubs and get drunk whenever they want.  Well it's late and I need to get to bed.

J-Momma

Weekly Friday Blog

Pages read this week: 102
Total Pages: 210
Books I've read: Tweak

Favorite Sentences of the week:

1. Recovery is strange, you know? I mean, it is so easy in a way and yet, well, so difficult.

2. But the thing is, as the months go by, I always seem to forget why I needed to get sober in the first place.

3. There're a ton of young people at the meetings....it's almost hip to be in recovery here.

These are my favorite sentences of the week because they talk about Nic finally getting into rehab and how difficult it is for him but he's going to try and make it through and get clean this time.  He actually wants to do something with his life and his sponser Spencer is helping him through everything.

Sick Day

Well I've been feeling pretty shitty lately and I slept like all day yesterday so I stayed home from school.  Partly cause I didn't feel good...partly because I had a bunch of homework..and partly because I hate Homestead and the people in it. So I slept in today and had to deal with a bunch of stupid family shit. I should have just gone to school so I wouldn't have to deal with this.  I tried to get out of my life and into Nic's life cause he's got it a lot harder then me but he put himself there and I didn't do anything to deserve any of this.  Nic had a good life and a good family, they didn't have money problems but his parents got divorced and that sucks. That's about the only thing in my life that doesn't suck. My parents are still married but we have a ton of issues. I'm trying to buy a car but I'm too young to get a loan so I have to through my mom and pay her every month but by the looks of it I'm not getting the car and I'm pretty pissed about it.  She feels bad and tries to help but it just pisses me off even more.  I'm so sick of worrying about money and I'm only 17 and I have the weight of so many peoples lives on my shoulders and I hate it.  I just wanna get away from all this.  I wanna go to college far away from here and far away from anyone I know so I can worry about me and my school work and my career but I can't do that. I have to stay here and fix everything...like always.  Nic just picked up and left everyone he cared about for drugs..he just wanted to hang out with girls and get high with his friends. He's not concerned about his family or the people he used to care about because they can stand on their own two feet but he can't.  I feel like my world is the opposite.  I feel like everyone around me needs me 24 hours a day and to bring money in to pay for all my own stuff but there just isn't enough time in the day for me to get everything done that I need to do.  I have so much homework but the days I'm off I just wanna see my friends cause I don't think about my problems as much but then I have to sit there and hear about there problems and act like I care but I really don't anymore...all the highschool drama is just stupid. I took myself out of it...I don't date guys from my high school anymore because their immature and don't have a clue about life after high school.  I just can't wait to get out of this place and move on from the stupid drama.

J-Momma